how dare I be so healthy... and FAT.

I'm not sure if I should be amused or furious at the berating I got yesterday from the nurse while getting my birth control shot. Apparently they're worried about weight gain, even though the ol' blood pressure is WAY down and has been for awhile. When I explained to the nurse that the weight gain was because I was nolonger starving myself, the nurse responded with... "well of course I couldn't ask you to return to an eating disorder, but something needs to be done. You're 31 pounds heavier than the lowest weight you've been since we've been seeing you." (for reference, I've been going to this same clinic since early 2006. So they were witness to my last serious bout with disordered eating, where I got down to a really low weight for me by starving myself and doing over an hour a day of cardio). So I repeated that at that time I was borderline starving myself and that my blood pressure was way higher at that lower weight. She double checked the chart and I was correct... but she kept pushing. I asked her point blank what the issue was. She told me that with the weight gain she'd recommend I use a different form of birth control that doesn't slow down metabolism (the depo is probably responsible for about 5-10 lbs of the "weight gain"). I told her I was 100% happy with depo, even if it was responsible for a small a few extra pounds. I told her it'd made me gain 5-10 lbs in the past and it wasn't a concern. I'd rather stay on that form of BC.

dead girl walking: BMI of 39.65, teetering on "morbidly obese" (40+) you guys.

It was just so frustrating, how she feigned concern, but couldn't tell me what she was concerned about except for the damn number on the scale. And she pretty much refused to acknowledge anything I said. I wish I'd been more collected and articulate, but I was just so completely confused by the ambush. Normally, after I get the shot, the nurse leads me out to the desk to make my next appointment, but this time they sent the 2nd nurse in just to "talk about the issue"... They caught me off guard and I'm sure I seemed defensive, but that's what happens when you're forced to defend yourself. Heh. She seemed determined to ignore that I'm in better health now, at the HIGHER weight (heaven forbid) than I was when I weighed less and had higher BP, was losing hair, was stressed beyond belief, etc.

So yes, I just had to share. I'll return with the last installment of Layers of Flavor before the week is through!